Monday, February 15, 2010

ADOPTION: My Story - Part 6

In September, a month after we found her, we celebrated her birthday. She was reunited with her younger brother and met her step-mother. She learned that she had grandchildren. She met my adoptive parents. She was afraid that they would look down on her for having given me up for adoption. I told her, "of course they'll look down on you! You're short!" (She was only 4' 10"!)
Over the next 2 1/2 years we built a relationship with Connie. We spent hours & hours talking & laughing & crying and had enormous phone bills. During that 2 1/2 years she spent time staying with three out of four of her children but finally became homesick for Boston & went back.
At 5:30 one morning in March, 2000, my phone rang. Scared the daylights out of me since my phone NEVER rings at that time of day. On the other end of the line was Connie's doctor. She said Connie had admitted herself to the hospital a few days before. She'd been depressed but was scheduled to be released that same day. She had died in her sleep.......
The next couple days were a blur. We wanted an autopsy. Since she had listed four children all four of us had to give our consent. Our brother Mark was not willing to give his okay. Finally he gave his consent, the autopsy was done but there was nothing conclusive. Her years of smoking, heart problems, diabetes, over-eating and depression just caught up with her. God said it was her time.
We had a memorial service for her... just the family. It was our hope that even when she left us that she'd know that we loved her... that even tho' she didn't raise any of us, she still gave us life and was still a mother. It was my hope that the talks we'd had about God's love and forgiveness sunk in & that she had, in her heart, asked Christ to be her savior!
In the 2 1/2 years we had with her my heart healed... and that morning in March, it broke again. It just dawned on me that it's been nearly 10 years since she left us. I still miss her... she had a laugh that was infectious & said things that would crack me up... and other things that would make a sailor blush!
The can of worms I opened ~ well, there are things that I've not liked but that was part of the deal. But I wouldn't change a thing!

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