ADOPTION... My Story: Part 3

Hmmm. I forgot to mention that shortly after meeting my grandmother & sister I got to meet my uncle. I wasn't really sure what to think about him... his attitude toward me. He did tell me that looking at me was like looking at his sister, my birthmom. That was the validation I was looking for! He drove a semi & would stop by to see me & my family when he was in the area.

I got to meet the older of my two half-brothers (I think I mentioned meeting him) - we had spoken on the phone several times & seemed to really get along well when we met. He would be the person who told me about growing up with our grandmother as caregiver. These things made me question even more the things she had told me. He was about 5 years old when our birthmom disappeared. He told me that he had few memories of her... most of them were memories of his abusive father beating up on her. Our phone conversations were usually quite lengthy as we went over & over information that had been given to us.

On New Year's Eve 1995 (or was it 1996?) our grandmother passed away. By this time, she had pushed away everyone but my sister. She'd not spoken to me in more than a year because I had the audacity to question some of her information. Her game had become this: as she noticed the four of us (kids) getting along really well, she'd stick her finger "in the pot" and try to stir up trouble. She did the same thing with our uncle if he was getting along with us too well. Life was good for her as long as she was the center of attention. Again, by the time she passed away one brother & I went to the funeral only to see if our birthmom would show up. How sad! We scoured faces & saw no one who even remotely looked like her.

Less than a month later we would all gather again in San Francisco for our grandfather's funeral. This funeral was far more traumatic, sadder than the first because grandpa continually spoke of "finding" our birthmom. We hadn't been able to fulfill that wish while he was alive. It then became our goal!! We (the older half-brother & I) began doing as much as we could to find her... including getting a private investigator. It was in July of 1997 that we received from the PI a list of women with the same name or similar name, along with their respective addresses & birthdates. We quickly eliminated women whose birthdates did not match or were not even close. We ended up with a rather short list. We finally picked ONE... the one we thought was the best/closest match. We purchased plane tickets... his from SF to Omaha, mine from Omaha to Boston.

To Be Continued.....

It's been a slow week!

I'm not complaining, mind you, just making note of it! Last weekend we traveled to the home of my father-in-law to spend time with family at the funeral of a dear uncle! He had been a SeaBee during WWII; the local Color Guard gave him a 21 gun salute & Taps was played as he was laid to rest. It was, of course, a sad time - but also time to reconnect with some of Jerry's cousins & other relatives.

Skeeter got to spend some quality time kenneled at the veterinarian's while we were gone & was VERY excited to be home. I don't know if he missed his tennis balls or me more!

Tuesday was auction night. Jerry bought some more stuff... but not a lot! eBay sales have been doing well so I can't really complain about that either!

Yesterday I finally knuckled under and called a local moving company to move our stacking washer/dryer out of the kitchen down to the basement. It was not an easy move for them by the sounds of it... but at least it's done! The washer/dryer has been sitting in the kitchen since we moved in - in November & we've been hauling our laundry to a launderette every week. Ugh! Our landlord came over & changed out the hoses & I did a load of laundry last night. Today is supposed to be REALLY nice, so I'll do a load of towels & hang them outside to dry in the sun! We moved the Hoosier cabinet into the space where the washer/dryer had been which made more room in the living/dining room.

Hopefully this trend will continue & the rest of the week / weekend will be calm.